It's a general one! I keep starting to sample stories and wanting to cut out about every third word. I know we have a batch of new people in MFU (and it's not just new people), and I know I'm generally cranky about flabby writing anyway. I just happened to sample several in a row like that and felt like venting. :-) Honestly:
"The reason why he thought he had to change his life was because he felt that he was in a rut. He felt that he was bored with everything - his wife, his job, his hobbies, his family, his friends. He felt that he needed a change - he needed something new, something stimulating. He needed a new hobby, a new job, a new wife - something, anything to get him out of this dull depression."
Or
"Everything was boring. Every. Thing. He had to change his life or die."
You know? Get to the meat of it, people! Make every word count!
And I should add, it's not bad writing, it's just freighted with lifeless words, deadwood that needs to be cut away. Every word should be a weight-bearing word. (Of course, this is a goal I fall short of too, but I strive for it)
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Date: 16 May 2008 04:17 am (UTC)Was that meant as a general rant or a specific one?
*ducks back behind monitor and checks word count*
(what's up?)
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Date: 16 May 2008 09:28 pm (UTC)"The reason why he thought he had to change his life was because he felt that he was in a rut. He felt that he was bored with everything - his wife, his job, his hobbies, his family, his friends. He felt that he needed a change - he needed something new, something stimulating. He needed a new hobby, a new job, a new wife - something, anything to get him out of this dull depression."
Or
"Everything was boring. Every. Thing. He had to change his life or die."
You know? Get to the meat of it, people! Make every word count!
/rant number two. :-)
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Date: 16 May 2008 09:31 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 16 May 2008 09:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 29 May 2008 06:17 pm (UTC)Hey, someone recced your Mary Sue story on crackvan, but the link is bad. I'll search File Forty.
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Date: 30 May 2008 03:20 am (UTC)The nerve! I mean, ooh. Awesome. :-) Perhaps I should try to supply a good link.
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Date: 30 May 2008 11:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 31 May 2008 03:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2 June 2008 01:12 am (UTC)